A Yard for Sale, A Bomb in our House and The Beer River

*****
While putting Ruby's clothes away, Savannah approaches me with a very serious question, but discusses it in a very casual, matter-of-fact way....

"Mom, will our house ever blow up?"
"Probably never."
"Never?"
"Yep."
"Well what if a bad guy puts a bomb in it?"
"Well, then our house will probably blow up."
"Oh. Okay."

****

While watching the opening song of Seussical the Musical Cade groans under his breath,
"Mooooom, this song just keeps going on forever and ever and ever! When will it stop?"

****

There's a girl in our neighborhood who Cade is certain has a crush on him. As such, he avoids her and won't even so much as look at her, in fear that he might actually act like he likes her too and then get teased for it.  Well, we happen to be good friends with the family and they had us over for dinner. Cade put on his imaginary "I'm avoiding you" goggles and immediately went to work on totally ignoring this sweet girl. To say her feelings were hurt would be a serious understatement. Not long later, all of our kids were happily buzzing around the yard chasing, squealing and laughing with each other, running through the stream in the garden, which my kids were referring to as "the river" -- or as Savannah would say, "the Wivah."

This morning, Cade woke me up excitedly to share his latest epiphany on the whole matter:

"Mom. I think there's beer in the river.  So anytime I am not liking Addie, I just need to go to the river and play in it and we'll be friends again. Don't you think?"

"Um, no Cade. I don't think there is beer in the river."

"No Mom. I think the SPIRIT is in the river You know, like the Holy Ghost?  He helps me to be nice and have fun and be friends with Addie."

savvy's style

Kyle brought in the mail a few evenings ago and a catalog magazine caught Savannah's eye. She grabbed it and immediately began perusing the magazine very excitedly, jumping up to show us each page that she loved, which was about every single page in the magazine.

She later sprawled herself on the carpeted family room floor to examine the pages more closely, and in a whisper to herself exclaimed,  "This is the most beautiful magazine," and sighed contentedly.

The magazine?  

Pottery Barn Kids.

Gotta admit it, the girl has taste.

----

While preparing lunch today, Savannah exclaimed cheerfully, "When I grow up, I'm going to be the NICEST mommy in the world."

"You're not going to be mean like me?" I asked, thinking she'd surely correct me and tell me I'm not mean.

In a very pleasant, matter-of-fact way she responded, "No. Not like you."

Good to know I'm doing my job right.

----

While munching on her favorite post-lunch treat, pop-corn, Savannah initiated a very important discussion:

"Mommy, when you and Daddy get old, can you move to another house?"

"Why?" 

"Cuz I wanna live here when I grow up. And there can't be two mommies in this house."

Of course.

----

If you were a fly...

... in the car you would hear Savvy discuss the following:

"Mom, when I get married, I never ever want to be pregnant. Because it's so hard to have a baby in your tummy and take care of it. I don't wanna frow up and be sick."

...and you would hear Cade wonder aloud,

"Mom, how come you're not more like Aunt Rebecca? She never gets grumpy."

If you were a fly at the kitchen table, you'd hear Kyle plead,

"Hon, could you not buy anymore pre-shucked corn? It makes me feel like a yuppie."

My darling family is always good for a laugh.

--JULY 2010

While hiking in Zion's National Park...

"Woah, Mom! Did you just see that huge branch I pulled off?"

"Sure did, Cade!"

"I'm getting so strong. It must have been from all that jerky I ate yesterday."

Our little Sassafrass

Me: Time to do your hair, sis!

Savvy: No. I like it slicked-back-rabbit-style*.

Me: (trying not to laugh at her funny mouthful of words) Why?

Savvy: Because I like it, (singing now) I love it, I want some more of it... I tried so hard..da da da dadaaahh...

Where did she come from?

*the way daddy combs it back after she bathes

the power of God....and more :)

A prayer given by Savannah:
"...And please bless my hair that it won't be ragga."  (as in ragamuffin)

From a prayer given by Cade

"...Bless Savannah that she won't be mean."

Cade to Savannah:
"Savannah, I know what you need to do the next time Tyler is mean to you!  Hold out your hand and say 'Stop! I have the power of God!'  And then God will shock him."

Savannah to the video camera when asked what her name is:
"Savannah Lee Woodbury dot com."

Cade, after being put to bed about 30 minutes prior,
"Mom, I have an emergency."
Me: "What's up?"
"I need to talk to you about something very important.  Melody told me she's not allergic to dogs OR puppies. Only cats and kitties. So that means we can get a DOG!!!"


December 2009

When I grow up

Savvy: Mom, I want to be a boy when I grow up.

Me: Why?

Savvy: Because. Because, because if I'm a boy, then I can go to school!

Me: Did you know that girls go to school, too? When you turn five that's when you can go.

Savvy: Yeah, but.... I still want to be a boy.


November 2009

Swapping Roles

Early in the morning Cade came in my room and asked,


"Mom, can you get me a bowl of cereal please?"

"Sure hon. Can you help me out of bed please?" I asked and held out my arm, continuing our morning ritual of Cade literally pulling me out of bed.


This time Cade had a new response.

"No, Mom. You have to do it yourself."

"What?" I asked, shocked and trying to stifle my laughter.

"You're a big girl. You can do it yourself."

I moaned a little and whined, "But I can't! I need your help."

"Sorry, Mom. If you don't do it by yourself, I'm going to take your gum away from you."

"You can't take my gum away," I said laughing.

"Oh yes I can. I'm giving it to Daddy now."


November 2009

True Cougar Fan

On the way to school one afternoon, we drove by a home with a huge University of Utah flag hung in the front window.


Cade spotted it and said,

"Hey look Mom! A BYU flag! Except they forgot the B and the Y..."

Men are from Mars...

Savannah and her cousin Tyler had pulled a table and some chairs out of Tyler's bedroom and were setting it up in the hallway. It's clear the two of them had different ideas of what they planned to do with the furniture rearrangement.

Savvy sat down on one of the chairs and scooted it up really close to the table and leaned into Tyler suggesting,

"Let's have a little talk, okay?"

Tyler looked at her and promptly lifted his chair up, put it on the table and walked away.

August 2009

Follow the Prophet

Barb hired some landscapers to work in the yard and Cade noticed a jug of tea on the deck left by one of them. He wanted a drink and I explained to him he wasn't allowed to because: a. the drink did not belong to him, and b. it would be breaking a commandment.

A few hours later we were off to the library and Cade stopped one of the men and said,

"Did you know the prophet said you shouldn't drink tea?"

"How come?" the man asked good naturedly.

"Because it's bad for our bodies."

"Okay then. Thank you sir," he answered.

Cade walked away feeling pretty proud about what he'd just done.

July 2009

Mario Kart... again.

While driving in the car Cade asked me,
"Mom, when you were little, did you LOVE Mario Kart?"
Attempting to make this a teaching moment I answered,"I didn't play Mario Kart when I was little. I did other more fun and exciting things."
"Like what?"
"Well, I played outside with my friends, explored in my backyard, played games in the tree house, rode my bike, read books...those sorts of things."
"Oh, well you should have played Mario Kart all the time, Mom."
"Why?"
"Because Mario Kart is AWESOME!"
"What does awesome mean?"
"Awesome means cool."
"What does cool mean?"
"Well, it means like not the cold cool."
"So if it doesn't mean the cold cool, what does it mean?"
"Like cool. Cool means cool, Mom."

So much for that teaching moment.

--July 2009

Enuf is enuf!

Savannah spotted a package of Oreos in the kitchen and asked if she could have one. I consented and handed her a cookie.While she chewed, I got a glass of milk and grabbed a cookie for myself. I dunked it in milk and swallowed. I went for another when she wasn't looking.She watched me grab my third cookie and in her bossy parental tone said,"Momma, dats enuf."

I pretended to listen, and when she wasn't looking, I went for number 5 (or was it six?).

"MOMMA! I SAID DAT'S ENUF!" She screeched. I closed the package, put it back on the counter and sheepishly went back to folding laundry.

A few minutes later I passed through the kitchen to put some clothes away in my bedroom to find a guilty-faced Savvy. She anounced cheerfully,

"Mom, I finished da cookies for youuu!"

June 2009

The word obsession does not do it justice....

Cade was overheard saying this to his cousin:

"Tyler, I LOVE your house. You have the best house because you have video games like Mario Cart."

Later Cade and I had this conversation, in hopes to slightly alter his focus a bit:

"Mom, Tyler's house is so fun. I love coming here to play video games."

"Yes, Tyler's house is fun. Do you like to come here because you get to play with Tyler, see baby Luke, play with fun toys, ride bikes and the video games?"

"Nope. I just like to come here for the video games."

Doesn't beat around the bush, does he?

A Glutton for Punishment?

While I was driving in the car I looked back and noticed Savvy was pouring her Capri Sun alllll over her lap.

"Savannah, why are you doing that?" I asked.

"Because, I want to get in trouble."

oh my.

Too young!

After spending the weekend with Kyle's family, including Kyle's brother Randy and his new girlfriend, Cade asked me this morning,
"Mommy, you know how Randy has a girlfriend? Who gets to be my girlfriend when I get big?"

"I don't know. Whoever you think is the nicest. And whoever I think is the best."

"Hmm. I think Sariah will be my girlfriend. She is SO beautiful."

He's too young for this!

04/13/2009

Who's the Boss?

We were at a family gathering and Cade stated matter-of-factly:

"Mommy, Daddy is the boss of you."

"Oh really? Who told you that?"

"Daddy did. Right, Daddy?"

Busted. We'll see who's boss.

March 2009

Cade's thoughts from Conference

During President Monson's talk:
"Hey look Mom, it's President Monson! He's old just like your Gramma Sheppard!"

During President Uchtdorf's remarks:
"Hey, that guy is speaking in a funny language like daddy does."

April 2009

So thoughtful

Kyle told Cade he wanted to take him whistle-pig hunting. Knowing there were guns involved made him rather cautious and indecisive. Finally after much thought, he announced his decision.

"Mom, I want to go hunting with Daddy. We need to kill more pigs so Pier 49 doesn't run out of pepperoni."

How thoughtful, my son is. He has decided to make keeping gramma and grampa's pizza store fully stocked on toppings his responsibility.

March 2009

Mortifying

I took Cade with me to the hospital lab while I got some blood tests done. The phlebotomist entered the room and Cade asked,
"Mommy, why is that lady big and round like a ball?"
"Shhhh!!! Now look at that machine Cade! It is SO COOL! Cade, do you know what that is?"
"Mommy, listen, I have a question." I shook my head at him when the phlebotmist wasn't looking.
He asked the awful embarassing question again anyway, this time much louder before I was able to shush him.I gave him the look of death and tried changing the subject again with,
"Wow, Cade. See all that blood? Isn't that NEAT!?"
"But Mom, I have to ask you---OW! Why are you squeezing my arm?! "


I wanted to die.

March 2009